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A college student in a philosophy class was taking his first examination.

On the paper there was a single line which simply said: “Is this a question?” – Discuss.

After a short time he wrote: “If that is a question, then this is an answer.”

The student received an “A” on the exam.

A kid called up his mom from his college and asked her for some money, because he ran out of it. His mom said, “Sure, sweetie. I’ll will send you some money. You also left your calculus book here when you visited 2 weeks ago. Do you want me to send that up too?”

“Uhh, oh yeah, okay,” responded the kid.

So his mom wrapped the book along with the checks up in a package and went to the post office to mail the money and the book.

When she gets back, her husband asked, “Well how much did you give the boy his time?”

She said, “Oh, I wrote 2 checks, one for $20 and the other for $1000 out to him.”

“That’s $1020!” yelled her husband. Are you crazy?”

“Don’t worry, Hon,” she said. “I taped the $20 check to the cover of his book, but I put the $1000 one somewhere between the pages in chapter 19!”

A college professor had just finished explaining an important research project to his class. He emphasized that this paper was an absolute requirement for passing his class, and there would be only two acceptable excuses for being late. Those were a medically certifiable illness or a death in the student’s immediate family.

A wisecracking student in the back of the classroom waved his hand and spoke up, “But what about extreme sexual exhaustion, professor?”

As you would expect, the class exploded in laughter. When the students finally settled down, the professor gave the student a long, appraising look. “Well,” he responded, “I guess you’ll just have to write with your other hand.”

A high-school student came home from school seeming rather depressed.

“What’s the matter, son,” asked his mother.

“Aw, gee,” said the boy, “It’s my marks. They’re all wet.”

“What do you mean `all wet?’”

“I mean,” he replied, “below C-level.”

A college professor had just finished explaining an important research project to his class. He emphasized that this paper was an absolute requirement for passing his class, and there would be only two acceptable excuses for being late. Those were a medically certifiable illness or a death in the student’s immediate family.

A wisecracking student in the back of the classroom waved his hand and spoke up, “But what about extreme sexual exhaustion, professor?”

As you would expect, the class exploded in laughter. When the students finally settled down, the professor gave the student a long, appraising look. “Well,” he responded, “I guess you’ll just have to write with your other hand.”



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