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Q. Did you see Dolly Parton’s new shoes?

A. Neither did she.

Did you hear that Princess Diana was on the radio,…. and the dashboard,… and the steering wheel,….

Bill Gates meets Hugh Grant at a Hollywood party. They are talking and Bill says: “I`ve seen some great pictures of Divine Brown lately, I sure would like to get together with her!”
Hugh replies: “Well Bill, you know ever since our incident, her price has skyrocketed, she`s charging a small fortune.”
Bill (with a chuckle): “Hugh, money`s no object to me. What`s her number.”
So, Hugh gives Bill her number and Bill sets up a date. They meet & after they finish, Bill is lying there in ecstasy, mumbling “God…now I know why you chose the name Divine.”
To which she replies: “Thank you, Bill…and now I know how you chose the name … Microsoft.”

Snoop Dogg had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months yet his wife stayed by his bedside every single day. When he came to conscious, he motioned for her to come nearer. As she sat by him, he said, “You know what’ You have been with me all through the bad times. When I got arrested, you were there to support me. When my movies flopped, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you gave me support. When my health started failing, you were still by my side. When I think about it now. ….

I think you bring me bad luck!”

Q. What did Michael Jackson say to Woody Allen?

A. Got two fives for a ten?



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