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Read all jokes from:Elephant (+69), Hunting (+66), Medical (+1844)
This man goes into the doctor with his ringhole in a terrible state, really bad now.
Read all jokes from:Hunting (+66)
Bubba and Jake chartered a plane with a pilot to drop them off in the wilds of Alaska for a week of elk hunting, just the same as they did the year before. When the pilot returned with the plane Bubba exclaimed joyfully to the pilot, “We had a great hunting trip! We bagged four elk!” The pilot regretfully explained, “Unfortunately, our plane can only fly with the weight of two elk. You’ll have to leave the other two behind.” Bubba and Jake were both infuriated and insistent. “We won’t allow you to fly this plane out without all four elk,” Jake demanded. The eager to please pilot relented and the plane took off with the three of them and their four elk. About fifteen minutes into the flight the engine started to sputter, and within seconds they were hurtling to the ground. Wearily arising from the wreckage, Bubba looked at Jake and wheezed, “Do you have any idea where we are?” Jake, quite pleased with himself, replied, “Yes! We’re about a mile from where we crashed last year.”
Read all jokes from:Hunting (+66)
It was Saturday morning as Jake, an avid hunter, woke up ready to go bag the first deer of the season. He walks down to the kitchen to get a cup of coffee, and to his surprise he finds his wife, Alice, sitting there, fully dressed in camouflage. Jake asks her, “What are you up to?” Alice smiles, “I’m going hunting with you!” Jake, though he had many reservations about this, reluctantly decides to take her along. Later they arrive at the hunting site. Jake sets his wife safely up in the tree stand and tells her, “If you see a deer, take careful aim on it and I’ll come running back as soon as I hear the shot.” Jake walks away with a smile on his face knowing that Alice couldn’t bag an elephant… much less a deer. Not 10 minutes pass when he is startled as he hears an array of gunshots. Quickly, Jake starts running back. As Jake gets closer to her stand, he hears Alice screaming: “Get away from my deer!” Confused, Jake races faster towards his screaming wife. And again he hears her yell: “Get away from my deer!” followed by another volley of gunfire. Now within sight of where he had left his wife, Jake is surprised to see a cowboy, with his hands high in the air. The cowboy, obviously distraught, says: “Okay, lady, okay!!!! You can have your deer!!! Just let me get my saddle off it!”
Read all jokes from:Animals (+5199), Bear (+406), Hunting (+66)
There’s this guy who shows up at a cabin where these hunters have gathered to hunt bear. Only he shows up without a gun. The other hunters are very curious. “How you gonna get a bear without a gun?” they ask. “Do you have a knife?” “No,” says the guy. “Do you have a club?” “No,” says the guy. “Don’t you worry. I’m gonna get myself a bear. Just wait right here and see.” The guy leaves the cabin and disappears into the hills for several hours. Eventually he happens upon a bear asleep in his den and he kicks the bear and gets it really angry. As the bear wakes up, he starts to chase after the guy, so the guy starts running back towards the cabin. Finally the hunters hear him running down the hill and yelling, “Open the cabin door! Open the door!” They open the door and the guy runs into the cabin and holds the door open behind him. To the terror of the other hunters, an angry bear follows close behind, running into the cabin, too. Then the guy slams the door shut, and says, “You skin that one. I’ll go get another.”
Read all jokes from:Dog (+335), Hunting (+66)
Two guys were out hunting, but they weren’t getting any ducks.
Read all jokes from:Elephant (+69), Hunting (+66), Medical (+1844)
This man goes into the doctor with his ringhole in a terrible state, really bad now.
Read all jokes from:Hunting (+66)
A man decided to buy a new telescope for his rifle as hunting season was about to start. He goes to a rifle shop and asks the clerk to show him a scope. The clerk takes out a scope and says to the man, “This scope is so good, you can see my house all the way up on that hill.” The man takes a look through the scope and starts laughing. “What’s so funny?” asks the clerk. “I see a naked man and a naked woman running around in the house,” the man replies. The clerk grabs the scope from the man and looks at his house. Then he hands two bullets to the man and says, “Here are two bullets, I’ll give you this scope for nothing if you take these two bullets, shoot my wife’s head off and shoot the guy’s dick off.” The man takes another look through the scope, and says, “You know what? I think I can do that with one shot!”
Read all jokes from:Hunting (+66)
Two hunters were dragging their dead deer back to their car. Another hunter approached pulling his along too. “Hey, I don’t want to tell you how to do something … but I can tell you that it’s much easier if you drag the deer in the other direction. Then the antlers won’t dig into the ground.” After the third hunter left, the two decided to try it. A little while later one hunter said to the other, “You know, that guy was right. This is a lot easier!” “Yeah, but we’re getting farther from the truck,” the other added.
Read all jokes from:Hunting (+66)
It was Saturday morning as Jake, an avid hunter, woke up ready to go bag the first deer of the season. He walks down to the kitchen to get a cup of coffee, and to his surprise he finds his wife, Alice, sitting there, fully dressed in camouflage. Jake asks her, “What are you up to?” Alice smiles, “I’m going hunting with you!” Jake, though he had many reservations about this, reluctantly decides to take her along. Later they arrive at the hunting site. Jake sets his wife safely up in the tree stand and tells her, “If you see a deer, take careful aim on it and I’ll come running back as soon as I hear the shot.” Jake walks away with a smile on his face knowing that Alice couldn’t bag an elephant… much less a deer. Not 10 minutes pass when he is startled as he hears an array of gunshots. Quickly, Jake starts running back. As Jake gets closer to her stand, he hears Alice screaming: “Get away from my deer!” Confused, Jake races faster towards his screaming wife. And again he hears her yell: “Get away from my deer!” followed by another volley of gunfire. Now within sight of where he had left his wife, Jake is surprised to see a cowboy, with his hands high in the air. The cowboy, obviously distraught, says: “Okay, lady, okay!!!! You can have your deer!!! Just let me get my saddle off it!”
Read all jokes from:Bear (+406), Hunting (+66)
Two men went bear hunting. While one stayed in the cabin, the other went out looking for a bear. He soon found a huge bear, shot at it but only wounded it. The enraged bear charged toward him, he dropped his rifle and started running for the cabin as fast as he could. He ran pretty fast but the bear was just a little faster and gained on him with every step. Just as he reached the open cabin door, he tripped and fell flat. Too close behind to stop, the bear tripped over him and went rolling into the cabin. The man jumped up, closed the cabin door and yelled to his friend inside, “You skin this one while I go and get another one!”
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