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Hey Diddle Diddle,
My penis is little
and shriveled
and shrunk like a prune.
But if you will squeeze it
And tease it, and please it,
It’ll blow up just like
A balloon.

Q: What do a meteorologist in a snowstorm and a woman’s sex life have in common?
A: They’re both concerned with how many inches and how long it will last.

A young couple on the brink of divorce visit a marriage
counselor. The counselor asks the wife about the problem. She
responds, “My husband suffers from premature ejaculation.”

The counselor turns to her husband and inquires “Is that true?”
The husband replies “Well not exactly, she’s the one that
suffers, not me.”

An older man wearing a stovepipe hat, a waistcoat and a phony beard sat down at a bar and ordered a drink. As the bartender set it down, he asked, “Going to a party?”

“Yeah,” the man answered, “I’m supposed to come dressed as my love life.”

“But you look like Abe Lincoln,” protested the barkeep.

“That’s right. My last four scores were seven years ago.”

Q: How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: One … Men will screw anything.



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