A guy went into a bar and met a nice girl. They have a few drinks and soon wound up at his place, in bed. They’re having a great time. She was on top when suddenly she had an epileptic seizure — she was shaking and foaming at the mouth. Our uninformed male thought this was incredible — the best sex he’d ever had!
He finished, but she is still shaking and thrashing about with her seizure. He began to get nervous and took her to the emergency room.
A nurse asked what the problem was and he replied, “I think her orgasm’s stuck!”
Even KY Jelly has jumped on the Millennium bandwagon with the slogan for their new, year 2000 compliant, product: “Y2K-Y Jelly : when you want to put four digits where only two could fit before!”
Henry Ford dies and goes to heaven. At the gate, the angel tells Ford, “Well, you’ve been such a good guy and your invention, the car, changed the world. As a reward, you can hang out with anyone you want in heaven.”
So, Henry Ford thinks about it and says, “I wanna hang with Adam, the first man.” So, the angel points Adam out to Ford.
When Ford gets to Adam, Ford asks, “Hey, aren’t you the inventor of the woman?”
Adam says, “Yes.”
“Well, says Ford, “You have some major design flaws in your invention:
1. There’s too much front end protrusion.
2. It chatters at high speeds.
3. The rear end wobbles too much.
4. And the intake is placed too close to the exhaust.”
“Hmmm…”, says Adam, “Hold on.” So Adam goes to the celestial supercomputer, types in a few keystrokes, and waits for the results. The computer prints out a slip of paper and Adam reads it.
He then says to Henry Ford, “It may be that my invention is flawed, but according to the stellar computer, more men are riding my invention than yours.”
Superman’s flying across the sky and he happens to cross over a tall building with Wonder-Woman and Invisible-Man together sunbathing. And it just so happens that Wonder-Woman is totaly naked!!
So Superman gets the idea that he can swoop down, fuck her, and she wouldn’t know what happened. So, Superman flies down, does his business, and Wonder-Woman says, “What the fuck just happened?”
And Invisible-Man says, “I don’t know, but my ass hurts!!!”
Michael Jackson and the doctor are walking out of the delivery room after his wife gives birth to their son. Michael says, “How long before we can have sex?”
The doctor says, “At least wait until he’s walking.”