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Read all jokes from:Sex (+4814)
At the ripe old age of 77, grandpa had decided to marry a young girl of 20.
Read all jokes from:LGBT (+289)
Two gays are driving down the street when they see a dog on the side of the road licking his pecker. “I sure wish I could do that,” said the one gay. To which the other replied, “Don’t you think you ought to pet him first?”
Read all jokes from:Sex (+4814)
This guy has a crush on a girl at his work. He is dying to ask her out on a date, but every time he sees her he gets the biggest erection ever. There is nothing he can do to control it. After some time, he decides to get her phone number and call her up. This way he won’t have to see her and he won’t get too excited. He ends up asking her out and she says yes. He figures what he’ll do is tie his penis to his leg so when he sees her it’ll be tied to his leg and she’ll never notice it. He gets to her house. When he knocks on her door, she answers the door in a sheer teddy. He kicks her in the face!
Read all jokes from:Sex (+4814)
Confucious say: “Man who goes to sleep with sex on mind wakes up with solution in hand.”
Read all jokes from:LGBT (+289)
In the days of Yore, long gone by, at the time of Camelot, there were many brave Knights, but the bravest of them all was Sir Lancelot. Sir Lancelot was the bravest of the brave, goodest of the good and purest of the pure. One day Sir Lancelot set out from Camelot on his trusty charger, his quest as ever, to slay dragons, rescue maidens and hopefully turn up the Holy Grail on the way. Resplendent in his shiny armor he set forth, brave, good and pure. However on this day, events took a decidedly strange twist, as out of nowhere a strange anomaly of time and space appeared, and before Sir Lancelot could rein in his horse, they plummeted through the vortex and were hurled many years through time and many miles through space, until finally … they landed in present day San Francisco. Slightly disorientated and completely naked (the anomaly did not transport non living tissue or in-organic substances), Sir Lancelot surveyed the new world that he had been thrust upon. His nakedness did not trouble him, for in his mind he was clad in the raiment of Goodness and Purity. Just then he spied what he thought must be an Inn of some form named “The Fudge Packer.” He entered this strange hostelry and noticed men clad in all manner of weird apparel. He believe that he saw women also, but on closer inspection, they turned out to be men as well, dressed in female clothing. Alas, Sir Lancelot did not watch where he was treading and his foot slid through a large strawberry daiquiri slick. He somersaulted into the air before landing on his head, knocking himself unconscious, draped face down over a chair and … a Good Knight was had by everyone!
Read all jokes from:Sex (+4814)
Kissing is a habit, He says he loves you 16 minutes of pleasure, The baby is a bastard
Read all jokes from:Sex (+4814)
Q: What was Dolly Parton voted in high school?
Read all jokes from:Sex (+4814)
This little boy walks into a whorehouse with fifty buck in one hand, and a dead duck in the other. He walks up to the madam, and tells her he wants to buy the nastiest, cheesiest, sluttiest whore she’s got! The madam, a little taken back by this, asks the little boy why he would want such a thing. So he tells her he wants to catch the herpes. She asks him what for? So he tells her, that he wants to catch the herpes, so he can go home and give them to his sister. The madam, totally flabbergasted, asks him to repeat what he just said. So he says, “Thats right! I want to catch the herpes, so I can go home and give them to my sister, then she can give them to my dad, then he can give them to my mom and then my mom can give them to the mailman, cause thats the son of a bitch that killed my duck!!!”
Read all jokes from:Sex (+4814)
A little guy, Stephen, without a great deal of sense was telling his friend that he couldn’t get a girl. His friend, Mike asked, “Man, aren’t you rich? Don’t you have all kinds of money?” Stephen said, “Yeah, I got th’ money. I just can’t get none.” Mike said, “Well, all you need to do is buy a boat. Women LOVE boats! You buy a boat, ask a girl if she wants a boat ride, take her twenty miles out, cut off the engine, and tell her to put out or swim. Then you come back and tell me how it went.” Stephen said, “Well, that seems like a good idea t’ me!” He went out the next day and bought a big boat, put it in the harbor, and waited. Finally a girl came by and looked at his boat. He said, “Y-y-you wanna go fer a boat wide wi’ me?” She thought he was kind of dumb, but she LOVED boats. She went. He drove her twenty miles out, pulled out the key and said, “Y-y-you g-g-got to p-p-put out, or y-y-you g-g-ot to swim.” She figured, “What the hell?” She dropped her little swimsuit and let him have some. He was so happy that he tried it again the next day. He sat by his boat; a girl walked by and looked at the boat. He asked, “Y-you w-wanna go fer a boat wide wi’ me?” She LOVED boats, and she decided to go. He took her twenty miles out, took out the key, and said, “Y-you gotta p-put out or swim!” She didn’t care. She took off her swimsuit and let him have some. The next day he was cocky! A little gal came by in a swimsuit that was made of less cotton than there is in the top of an aspirin bottle. He saw her look at the boat and said, “Hey, Bitch! Wanna go fer a boat wide w’ me? Don’t make no damn difference t’ me!” She jumped into the boat and he took her twenty miles out, jerked out the key, and said, “Put out or swim!” She dropped her little swimsuit and damn the STINK! The smell was so bad he had to cover his head. He said, “Whew! Never mind! Put that swimsuit back on and don’t get none of that on me!” She reached into her pocketbook and took out a pistol, aimed it at his head, and said, “Eat it or swim.” When Stephen was telling Mike about it, the goofy guy’s friend said, “Oh, my God! What did you do?” Stephen answered, “You didn’t hear about no guy drownin’ out there, did you?”
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