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Define “Egghead:” What Mrs. Dumpty gives to Humpty.

* “Wanna swap meds?”

* “Can I buy you a spatula?”

* “Bet you’re wondering why I have no nostrils?”

* “Your crawlspace or mine?”

* “You look like the kind of person who appreciates catheters.”

* “May I lick your forehead?”

* “Do you always wear your shoes over your socks? ”

* “Smeep. Smeep. Smeep.”

* “What’s your favorite flavor of wood?”

* “You’ve stolen my heart, but thats okay because I have three more back home in the freezer!”

Robinson came home in great excitement and said to his wife, “You’ll never believe it, dear, but I’ve discovered an entirely new position for lovemaking.”
“Really,” said Mrs. Robinson, interested at once. “What is it?”
“Back to back.”
“But that’s crazy. We can’t do anything back to back.”
“Yes we can. I’ve persuaded another couple to help out.”

Condominium – A prophylactic for midgets.

Q: Why is being in the military like a blowjob?
A: The closer you get to discharge, the better you feel.

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