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A little girl asks her father, “where do little girls come from?”
The father says, “they come from a hard-on.”
The little girl then asks her father, “where does a hard-on come from?”
The father says, “little girls!”

A man was walking one day, when he came to this big house in a nice neighborhood. Suddenly he realized there was a couple making love out on the lawn. Then he noticed another couple over behind a tree. Then another couple behind some bushes by the house. He walked up to the door of the house, and knocked. A well dressed woman answered the door, and the man asked what kind of a place this was. “This is a brothel,”replied the madam.

“Well, what’s all this out on the lawn?” queried the man.

“Oh, we’re having a yard sale today.”

Q: Why is the book “Women Who Love Too Much” a disappointment for many men?
A: No phone numbers.

Three hookers of varying ages were standing around, discussing their profession. The middle aged one said: “So, how’s business?”

“Awful!” replied the young one. “All anybody wants is blow jobs!”

“What’s wrong with that?” asked the mid-lifer. “It’s easy work, a quick turn over, and you can make more money that way.”

“That’s just the problem,” exclaimed the young lady, “I can’t get more than $20.00 for a blow job! How can I make any money that way?”

“Oh,” she replied, shrugging, “that’s nothing. When I started working, we only got $10.00 for a blow job!”

At this point the old hooker chimed in. “You kids have it so easy! Why, back in my day, we had to give blow jobs for free! And we were glad to get something warm in our bellies, too!”

The very snobbish wife was discussing the subject of Christmas presents with her maid.

“Now what about the butler?” the rich woman said.

“A set of wine glasses?” the maid suggested.

The woman frowned icily. “He doesn’t really need that. A butler never entertains. He’ll get a tie.”

The maid grimaced, but said only, “What about a dress for Jenny, the serving girl?”

The woman frowned again. “She doesn’t really need a new dress. She’ll only get in trouble. We’ll get her another apron.”

The conversation continued in the same vein, and the maid was chafing at her employer’s arrogance when they reached her husband.

“I assume you want to get him something he really needs, madam?” the maid replied.

“Of course,” the woman replied.

“Then what about five more inches?”

© 2015