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Said a pretty young whore from Hong Kong
To a long pronged patron named Wong,
“They say my vagina’s
The nicest in China;
Don’t ruin it by doing it wrong.”
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There was a young man from the Clyde
Who fell down a sewer and died
Next day his brother,
Fell down another
And now they’re interred side by side.
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There was an old count of Swoboda
Who would not pay a whore what he owed her.
So, with great savoir-faire,
She stood on a chair
And pissed in his whiskey-and-soda.
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There once was a man from Peru
Who was desperately hanging out for a screw.
He picked up a moll
And rammed home his pole
Then said, “Jesus, that was Long overdue.”
36 views |
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There once was a man from Cheyenne
Of women, he was a fan
But they thought “Damn he’s fat!”
“I’m not touching that!”
So he had to rely on his hand.
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There once was a boy dressed in blue,
Out looking for someone to screw.
But a lady in red
Gave him such good head,
That he came so unscrewed that he’s through.
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The was a man named Sir Lancelot
Who went to parties and danced a lot
When making a pass
At a young pretty lass
The front of his pants would advance a lot!
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Ginger from County of Dade
Said, “I think it’s time I got laid.”
“My vibrator can tingle
But it’s not cunnilingual”
And that’s how orgasms are made.”
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There once was a couple named Kelly
Who had to walk belly to belly
Because in their haste
They used wallpaper paste
Instead of petroleum jelly.
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Nymphomaniac Alice
Used a dynamite stick as a phallis.
They found her vagina
In North Carolina,
And part of her anus in Dallas.
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