Read all jokes from: Little Johnny (+648)
For weeks a six-year old lad kept telling his first-grade teacher about the baby brother or sister that was expected at his house. One day the mother allowed the boy to feel the movements of the unborn child. The six-year old was obviously impressed, but made no comment. Furthermore, he stopped telling his teacher about the impending event.
The teacher finally sat the boy on her lap and said, “Johnny, whatever has become of that baby brother or sister you were expecting at home?”
Johnny burst into tears and confessed, “I think Mommy ate it!”
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Read all jokes from: Little Johnny (+648)
A father asked his son, Little Johnny, if he knew about the birds and the bees.
“I don’t want to know!” Little Johnny said, exploding and bursting into tears.
Confused, his father asked Little Johnny what was wrong.
“Oh Pop,” Johnny sobbed, “For me there was no Santa Claus at age six, no Easter Bunny at seven, and no Tooth Fairy at eight. And if you’re telling me now that grownups don’t really get it on, I’ve got nothing left to believe in!”
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Read all jokes from: Little Johnny (+648)
Little Johnny was going to a public school and he was doing very badly in maths. So his mother decided to put him into a Catholic school. When she got his report card at the end of the term, his marks in maths had improved tremendously.
So she asked him why. He replied “When I saw that naked guy nailed to the plus sign, I knew they meant business”!!
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Read all jokes from: Little Johnny (+648)
Little Johnny’s mother decided to give her son an anatomy lesson one day, so she took off all of her clothes and pointed to her vagina, and said, “Johnny. This is where you come from.”
Johnny went to school the next day smiling and insisting all his friends now refer to him as “Lucky Johnny.”
“Why?” one asked.
Johnny held his fingers an inch apart and said, “Because I came this close to being a turd.”
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Read all jokes from: Little Johnny (+648)
The math teacher saw that little Johnny wasn’t paying attention in class. She called on him and said, “Johnny! what are 4, 2, 28 and 44?”
Little Johnny quickly replied, “NBC, CBS, HBO and the Cartoon Network!”
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Read all jokes from: Little Johnny (+648)
Little Johnny was going to a public school and he was doing very badly in maths. So his mother decided to put him into a Catholic school. When she got his report card at the end of the term, his marks in maths had improved tremendously.
So she asked him why. He replied “When I saw that naked guy nailed to the plus sign, I knew they meant business”!
30 views |
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Read all jokes from: Little Johnny (+648)
It is near the end of the school year. The teacher has turned in her grades. There is really nothing to do and all the kids are
restless. The teacher says, “Whoever answers the questions I ask first and correctly can leave early today.”
Little Johnny says to himself, “Good, I want to get outta here I’m smart and will answer the question”.
The teacher asked, “Who said Four Score and Seven Years Ago? Before Johnny could open his mouth, Joya said, “Abraham
Lincoln”. The teacher said, “That’s right Joya. You can go”.
Johnny was MAD.
The teacher asked, “Who said, I Have a Dream?” Before Johnny could open his mouth, Mary said, “Martin Luther King”. “That’s
right Mary. You can go”.
Johnny was even MADDER than before.
The teacher asked, “Who said Ask not, what your country can do for you?” Before Johnny could open his mouth, Marol said, “John
Kennedy”. “That’s right Marol. You can go”.
Johnny was BOILING MAD.
Then the teacher turned her back, and Johnny said, “I wish these women would keep their mouths shut”.
The teacher asked, “WHO SAID THAT?”
Johnny said, “BILL CLINTON, CAN I GO NOW?”
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Read all jokes from: Little Johnny (+648)
Little Johnny was late for school. When he finally got there his teacher asked, “Why are you late little Johnny?”
Johnny replied, “My grandpa got burnt, Miss.”
The teacher replied, “I hope it wasn’t too bad.”
Then little Johnny said, “Don’t worry, the crematorium doesn’t fuck around!”
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Read all jokes from: Little Johnny (+648)
There has been an emergency when Bert gets home from work. His 9 year old son, Little Johnny called to tell him that his younger son has been hurt, he was hit by a car. Bert rushes through the doors of the emergency room at the hospital, “I got here as fast as I could! How is Milton?”
He is told by his wife, “He’s fine. He needed three stitches in his chin.”
“Johnny told me what happened! Thank goodness he’s all right! Thank goodness he wasn’t killed! I can’t believe our Little Milty was hit by a car!”
“That’s what Johnny told you?” asks Wilma.
“Well, he said some other stuff, too, but I was running out the door? Why?”
“Are you familiar with the ‘Hot Wheels’ line of vehicles?”
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Read all jokes from: Little Johnny (+648)
Little Johnny comes home from school with a note from his teacher, indicating that “Johnny seems to be having some difficulty with the difference between boys and girls,” and would his mother, “please sit down and have a talk with Johnny about this.”
So johnny’s mother takes him quietly, by the hand, upstairs to her bedroom,and closes the door.
- first, Johnny, I want you to take off my blouse.
So he unbuttons her blouse and takes it off.
- ok, now take off my skirt…
And he takes off her skirt.
- now take off my bra.
Which he does.
- and now, Johnny, please take off my panties.
And when Johnny finishes removing those, she says, “Johnny, PLEASE don’t wear any of my clothes to school any more!”
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