Q. Did you hear about the Alabama quarterback who tried to throw himself on the floor in a fit of rage?
A. He missed!
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Read all jokes from:Alabama (+375)
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Read all jokes from:Alabama (+375)
Two Alabamians are walking down different ends of a street toward each other and one is carrying a sack. When they meet, one says, “Hey Tommy Ray, what’cha got in th’ bag?”
“Jus’ some chickens.
“If I guess how many there are, can I have one?”
“I’ll give you both of them.”
“OK. Ummmmm…… five?”
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Read all jokes from:Alabama (+375)
An Auburn fan and an Alabama fan both go over to Tunica to do a little gambling. After a couple of hours the Alabama fan was broke. He looks over and sees the Auburn fan with a wheelbarrel full of quarters.
The Alabama fan walks over to him and says, “Wow, where did you win all that?”
To which the Auburn fan replies, “You see that machine on the wall over there? If you put a dollar in you get four quarters back every time!”
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Read all jokes from:Alabama (+375)
Q: What do a divorce in Alabama, a tornado in Kansas, and a hurricane in Florida have in common?
A: Somebody’s fixin’ to lose them a trailer.
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Read all jokes from:Alabama (+375)
Q. Do you know the difference between an Auburn fan getting run over by a car and an Alabama fan?
A. There are skid marks in front of the Bama fan!!
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Read all jokes from:Alabama (+375)
A man walks into a store says to the clerk, “I’d like a pair of red shoes, a white shirt, a pair of red pants, and a pair of white shoes.” The clerk looks at him and shakes his head saying, “You must be an Alabama fan!” The man proclaims with pride, “How could you tell, was it the color scheme!” The clerk looks at him and says “No, this is a hardware store.”
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Read all jokes from:Alabama (+375)
Q. What do you get when you have 32 Alabamians in the same room?
A. A full set of teeth.
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Read all jokes from:Alabama (+375)
Q. What’s a seven course meal at Auburn?
A. A possum and a six-pack.
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Read all jokes from:Alabama (+375)
A guy went to Tuscaloosa and picked up one of those new Mercedes. He was testing it out in the parking lot, turned on the radio and nothing happened.
Furious, he demanded to see the sales manager, and told him “When I buy a $50,000 car I expect the dang radio to work.”
The sales manager explained to him that the radio had been programmed to his voice and all he had to do was tell the radio what he wanted to hear.
He got back into the car and said “Country music,” and old Willie Nelson started singing. “Rock and roll,” he exclaimed, and immediately Elvis started crooning. “Easy listening,” he remarked, and all at once it sounded like he was in an elevator. He was relaxed, driving up I-59 to Birmingham, and listening to smooth sounds.
Then a pickup truck with two good ole boys almost ran him off the road. “Stupid rednecks!” he screamed. The radio immediately blurted out, “TOUCHdooooooooown AllaBAAAAAAAmaaa!!!!”
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Read all jokes from:Alabama (+375)
Q. Why did they build the Mercedes plant so close to the University of Alabama?
A. Because they have an endless supply of crash test dummies right down the road.
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