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Q: How do you know if your cat has eaten a duckling?
A: She’s got that down in the mouth look!

Q: Why did the soldier salute the tiger?

A: Because the tiger had more stripes.

A man rented a camel to make a trip to an important customer out in the
desert. There was only one camel available, and it had one little problem,
the guy told him. Periodically, this camel would stop and refuse to move
until somebody beat it off. The man is desperate, so he decides he will go
along with that. He sets off into the desert. Sure as hell, he has to beat
off the camel every day for the first three days. On the fourth day, the
camel stops again and refuses to move, so the guy gets down and prepares
to do his duty, but the camel quickly steps aside. He tries again, And
again. Finally in exasperation he walks in front of the camel and says
“For Christ’s sake, what do you want now?” The camel puckers up and makes
little sucking noises.

Q: What do mice do when they’re at home?

A: Mousework!

Q: What does a twelve-pound mouse say to a cat?

A: “Here Kitty, kitty, kitty”!

Q: What kind of musical instrument do mice play?

A: A mouse organ!

Q: Why do mice have long tails?

A: Well, they’d look silly with long hair!

Q: Who has large antlers, a high voice and wears white gloves?

A: Mickey Moose!

Q: How do you save a drowning mouse?

A: Use mouse to mouse resuscitation!

Q: Where do hamsters come from?

A: Hamsterdam!

Q: What’s a mouse’s least favorite record?

A: What’s up Pussycat!

Q: Why do mice need oiling?

A: Because they squeak!

Q: What do rodents say when they play bingo?

A: “Eyes down for a full mouse”!

Q: Why did the mouse push his bed into the fireplace?

A: He wanted to sleep like a log!!!

This really really old guy is walking on the beach one day. He hears a little teenie tiny voice calling out “Hey
Mister … pssst … come here.”
He looks around and sees a little tiny frog under a palm tree. He picks it up and it says “Hey Mister … if you kiss
me, I’ll turn into a beautiful young woman and your wishes will be my commands forever.”
He takes the frog, puts it in his pocket, and starts to walk back toward home.
The frog says “Hey, what are ya doing? Don’t ya want to kiss me?”
The old man says, “No … to tell you the truth, at my age, a talking frog is worth a whole lot more to me.”



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